Some cogent rules of life development and goals achievement

I have had the opportunity of working with a group of people severally. This I have done either as an academician, an actor, rap artiste or a model. Term paper delivery or defense in school especially during my days gave me a chance to study a lot of people. Among a large group of people, you will observe that only a few make it happen. Only a few determine the course of every organization in accordance to the elite theory in political science. The minority determines the fate of the majority. It’s always an affair of a privileged few. The majority will always want to sit back and watch.
Not everybody is interested in making sacrifices either time-wise, material or financial sacrifices. It got more evident to me as an entertainer. I have had the privilege of being part of a couple of stage drama groups that were quite sizeable. Acting is a team activity, no matter how good you think you are; you can't do it all. You will still need those minor characters with their minor roles to make-up for the major role you are playing. This gave me a chance to study different sets of people consciously and unconsciously. Even though I couldn't make achieve my long-term dream of being a prominent figure in the showbiz industry, I learned a couple of values that guide me. Permit me to share them with you.

This is based on my experience thus far as a youth. There are some guidelines that will help you fix the puzzle of life and simplify it if they are followed just like a roadmap. They are enumerated and explained below:

Never outshine the master
Always make those above you feel comfortably superior. In your desire to please or impress
them, do not go too far in displaying your talents or you might accomplish the opposite inspire fear and insecurity. Make your masters appear more brilliant than they are and you will attain the heights of power. This is certainly hard to do. In a group situation, you will always find a member doing perfectly something you lack. Nobody has it all, this attracts envy. Prolonged envy leads to hatred, then disunity which destroys any team no matter how formidable it may appear. No matter the height of your achievements, give the credit to your leader and the team. Make people know the impossibility of things without them. Even after a display of brilliance, make them see how simple it is. If possible, tell them it was more of luck. Don't ever leave a space for unhealthy competition or rivalry to breed.

Never disclose your direction
No matter the angle you want to view issues from, you will realize the fact that life is a competition. Even at the church setting, you see individuals trying to dominate others either consciously or unconsciously. The nature endemic nature of human beings is to have it all. For this reason, staying of the radar of people will guarantee more success opportunities for you. Giving a life example, I used to have a friend I have known for virtually 11 years. To an extent he cares about me. The margin between my salary and his is quite unimaginable. But it will shock you that any progressive move I make no matter how small it is makes him uncomfortable. He is scared of losing the spot of being my life coach. That doesn't make him my hater or enemy. In fairness we are all guilty of that in one way or the other.
Furthermore, keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your
actions. If they have no clue what you are up to, they cannot prepare a defense. Guide them far enough down the wrong path, envelope them in enough smoke, and by the time they realize your intentions, it will be too late.

Never put too much trust in friends,
I have nothing against friendship. I don't believe in a solitary way of life. No man is an island and considering the efficacy of communication and information, you need friends around. Friends could build your life; friends could destroy your life. When you are doing terrible or let me say below par in life, you will observe that a lot of people will rally round you to make diverse comments and offer helping hands in some occasions. It gives you a feeling of being with the best team but the moment you get on your feet and soar high than them, they start to take up defensive positions with readiness to attack you at no just cause. That's who we are, life is an unending drama, and it is a competition. If you are not competitive, you get left out. Life is like a pyramid. We all wish to be at the top together even when we know it cannot contain us.
 Learn how to use Enemies. This is an important tool for survival. Nobody can love you as much as you love yourself. It’s on this ground that I believe no love can be compared to the purity of love we get from our parents; it can be likened to the quality of agape love from God.

Be wary of friends-they will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. In fact, you have more to fear from friends than from enemies. The sole reason is that your enemies are closer to you in the form of friends. They have a close affinity to you, they know the loopholes. You will realize it takes closeness for someone to criticize you vividly. An outsider is always left in the dark and doubts about issues. If you have no enemies, find away to make them. This sounds funny but it’s real. Your enemies could be highly beneficial in the sense that they help you detect your weaknesses. This is something that maybe impossible for you to figure out. They do the hard work of research for you. Any sensible person will tackle such problems after they have been discovered.

Get rid of superiority complex and develop a team spirit
I must confess that it is difficult not to be arrogant when you are good at something. There is this bossy feeling that clouds your head. The feeling of being indispensable sets in. As time goes on you start to demand for a special respect from people. If care is not taken, that point of satisfaction will only make that individual stagnant. Keep aiming high. Admire people that will make you feel like nothing. As long as the hunger is there, you will never stop getting better.

Get rid of emotional weakness
Everybody is emotional, even military men that seem so heartless express emotions too but the different between them and others is that they suppress it. Emotions could lead to a weakness. Even when you are pushed to the wall, hide your feelings. Expression too much of emotion makes your direction public; it leads to hasty and poor decisions. This amounts to the reason why people say a lot of terrible things when they are angry and then express regrets about them later.  An emotional person gets easily thrown off balance. Life isn't a bed of roses, challenges will always make the future bleak but the never-say-die attitude separates a successful person from a failure. This is an invaluable lesson my boss taught me.

Stay focused on the goal and not the mid-field
This is an analytical view from the perspective of football. In a football game, the level of possession doesn't win a match; rather victory is earned by the number goals. Don't be distracted. Set goals and objectives when embarking on any feasible project; write them down to always remind yourself of the game plan. Don't be weighed down by the challenges or the means. The end is what the people want to see. Nobody cares about a day to day analysis of the 9months pregnancy period; the baby is what they all want to celebrate. There is the possibility of non-challant colleagues influencing you with some odd characters. Be an agent of change, be the person to change them through leading by example.

Believe in yourself
If you can't change yourself, then you can't change the people around you. Any battle you will win out there has to be won in your heart. Believing in yourself gives you the required confidence to survive challenges and destructive criticisms by people who engage in such for no just cause. If you don't believe in yourself, nobody will believe in you and certainly that positive energy in you will not low. Your perception counts. Don't see problems, see possibilities.

Be selfless in service delivery
Treat every engagement/activity like it’s yours. Don't let money drive you. Yes, in this 21st century loyalty is for sale but money is very tricky. It appears its close even when it is far away and it will never come until some skills are perfected. Act in a way that will restore people's hopes in humanity. Don't wait to act when supervision is intense. It brings out the best in you. A contractor that fails to execute a small project will never be entrusted with big ones except in an abnormal setting.

Develop a high tolerance for criticisms
Criticisms naturally go with progress. Feel appreciated when criticized. It shows you are worth someone's attention. Nobody puts the views of a retarded man under consideration. It is paramount when you are dealing with social issues where people view cases from different angles depending on their historical, educational background etc. Don't get too defensive, take time to ruminate over them no matter how painful. This can be done when you are alone on bed and ready to hit the sack. It will help you get better because nothing is perfect. It’s an innovative age where there is always a new idea to execute a project.

We all dream of perfect conditions. We tend to crave for a boost of joy and probably no chance for pains or sad moments. This only exists in the utopian world of imaginations and not the real world we live in. Most times we always believe we deserve more than we get. Most people work like elephants and eat like ants but I tell you today that you are building the resume to qualify you for a greater future. Look past the difficult times and keep striving for success. Quitters never win and winners never quit.

 The list seems endless but the bitter truth is that learning process in life never stops until we stop breathing. Life is the best teacher and the more we live, the more we learn. I believe strongly that anything that doesn't kill you is for the purpose of making you stronger. I have had a couple of tough experiences in life but I never allowed them to have a negative impact on me. I learned beauty tips from ugly situations to make the future better. Life is short, make every moment of your life count for something positive. Live like you are going to die the following day. That orientation helps you in giving you best. Thanks for your time.

Osayimwen Osahon George
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About Osahon

I'm a journalist and a Political Scientist undergoing a doctoral programme focused on media, democracy and governance in Africa. My mission is to uphold the role of the media as the 'fourth estate of the realm' and also tell the Nigerian Story to the world. You can contact me on Phone number: +2347053302356.
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